The Brok-ation

Brok-ation: A Vacation For the Broke

So you might be wondering, what exactly is a brokation? Well, it essentially translates to a broke vacation, or as I like to humorously put it, “a vacation for the broke,” or perhaps, for a more refined touch, “a vacation on a budget.”

Hello, I’m Sara – no, not Sarah Chemaissem, just Sara, also known as Sarah’s Personal Assistant. I’m usually the one working behind the scenes, managing all of Sarah’s social media content, greeting you at the reception desk, and handling all the mundane paperwork and activity sheets Sarah throws my way. I even spend my after-hours listening to Sarah’s 6-minute voice messages right before bed and as soon as I wake up, which, I admit, has me hallucinating about her voice in my nightmares – erm, I mean, dreams.

You might be wondering how Sarah landed such a young and amazing employee like myself. Well, what you don’t know is that just the week before I started working for her, Sarah was actually just my mother’s best friend – more like an aunt because she practically raised me alongside her own kids since I was 7. I was spending a few days at her house because I was feeling down and wanted to get away from home. So, it was a mini-vacation for ME. However, Sarah decided she needed a getaway too, so she suggested we all go on holiday for a few days to unwind. But here’s the catch – we were broke, and we had all three of her kids with us. Regardless, we didn’t care. We packed up and drove to Melbourne, which turned out to be quite a traumatic experience with three kids and two Sarahs crammed into one car for 11 hours – but I’ll leave that to your imagination.

We arrived in Canberra and checked into a 3-star motel – again, don’t judge, we were on a tight budget. But seriously, how bad could it be for just one night’s sleep? Right? Well, let me be the first to tell you, we didn’t get any sleep. With three scared kids, drunk men outside our door, bed bugs feasting on us, dust galore, and my fear of bugs and creepy crawlies, it was anything but restful. Of course, Sarah, being the therapist that she is, tried to keep us all calm while secretly panicking herself. Did I mention the part where Sarah, her oldest daughter Lucinda, and I wore matching pajamas that we bought from a Costco near our motel? Yeah, that was a cute touch. We even tried to take a picture together in our matching PJs, but with our short arms, I, being the genius I am, used my toes as a makeshift tripod. Call me Miss Flexible.

But after a long and traumatic experience with the motel bed bugs we hit the runner at 4am in the morning and made it to Melbourne. Melbourne was pretty nice, I admit, and the shopping center we visited was massive, boasting every luxury brand and shop imaginable. But, of course, we opted to spend what little money we had on food to sustain us during our stay. We found ourselves returning to the same mall at the end of each day, indulging in “shoffing” – a term we coined for window-shopping. We’d browse every shop and item, dreaming of buying them “next time” when we were rich, before heading back to our hotel to call it a day.

But let me tell you, despite being broke and traumatized, unable to afford Louis Vuitton or Gucci, we had the most laughter-filled time. We developed six packs from all the laughter and then promptly gained another six flabs from indulging in all the food Melbourne had to offer – the one thing we could always afford. We bonded and had the best time together, making the most of our budget-friendly adventure. Sarah and her kids even discovered a gluten-free wonderland bakery, which I had to forcibly drag them out of after they cleared out all the shelves. As for me, well, I found myself amidst a family of lunatics, and my family friend/aunt became my boss – and, to be honest, it’s been a whirlwind ever since. Eight months later, she still won’t fire me, no matter how hard I try, or even let me plan another brokation!

So, there you have it – the tale of our unforgettable brokation. 

Sara Eid